Saturday, February 22, 2003

Elemental Revision

France has been taking a beating all over the web and deservedly so.

I am still incensed over their pomposity and arrogance. Their selfish motives for attempting to preserve Saddam Hussein are absolutely inexcusable.

I was looking at the periodic table of elements and came across Francium.

Chart from State University of New York.

This element was named for France by M. Curie in honor of her country.

In light of France's perpetual anti-civilization behavior, I am now beginning a campaign to rename Francium. A country as vulgar as France should not have the honor of having the element named after it.

I will hereby call this fine element, Britanium after the fine country of Great Britain which has given the world a model for fighting fascism. They never surrendered to Hitler's Germany nor did they capitulate to Argentina over the Falklands affair. To this day, Britain retains a tradition of fighting fascism.

There is also the element with an atomic number of 63 named Europium after the continent of Europe.

I prefer it be named after the first astronomer who discovers intelligent life forms in France.

Berkeley, being the home of the University of California, has the element with the atomic number of 97 named after it (Berkelium). Now that Berkeley leads the world in freakazoidal leftist political insanity, this honor should be revoked. I hereby rename the element; Blogium in honor of our cherished medium.

America already has Americium (Number 95) named after it so no worries there.

posted by Wild 10:28:00 AM |

French Boycott

Foxnews.com is reporting the beginnings of a boycott of French products. Americans and I are showing displeasure with Jacque Chirac by rejecting products of France.

This has to be scary for the French exporters. Once people turn away from French cheese and wine, they may never return. They may acquire a liking for alternate products.

All who have read this blog over time know that my eyes are watering with joy over this news.

I myself am so committed to my own boycott of France that I have actually removed a wad of half-chewed cheese from my mouth upon realizing that it was made in France.

Please join me in this growing movement to send a signal of displeasure to France.

These are things you can do to boycott France at the level that matches their childish, selfish, vile, putrid evilness:

[1] If you see French products at the supermarket, publicly pick your nose and then fondle the goods with your fingers while saying, "My Precioussss".

[2] If you see French wine, scratch the label off and replace it with a sticker that says "coward juice"

[3] If you see a block of French cheese on sale, smear some agar jelly on the surface and use a dead fly to write "Made in France " through the jelly. In 24 hrs, your note will be visible as an unsightly hairy growth.

[4] Go to a French car dealership. Stare maniacally at one of the Peugeots and repeatedly scream, "RED RUM, RED RUM". Alternatively, you could stand in the center of the showroom and loudly ask, "Doesn't Citroen mean 'Lemon'?"

[5] Go to the Air France ticket counter at the airport and stare at the ticket sales person and repeatedly scream, "I don't eat toads" or...

[6] Have a makeup artist create large open sores on your face and arms then stand in line at the Air France ticket booth. Occasionally, dip your finger in one of the 'sores' and then suck on the finger while moaning softly."

You guys can start in the Southern U.S and work your way North. I'm doing Canada.

Meet you in Montana.

posted by Wild 4:38:00 PM |

And So It Begins

The war has begun.

The war at Bloviating Inanities between Madonna and Acidman has started off with a first salvo already launched.

Do pass by to see the descent into the bowels of humanity.

posted by Wild 4:01:00 PM |

Haloscan back in Service?

After separating my comments and I for a number of days, it looks like Haloscan is back on line.

I had torn out all the Haloscan code to avoid the annoying error messages but it is now replaced and ready to test.

Here goes.

posted by Wild 1:29:00 AM |

Shut Up Bill and Jimmy

Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton were instructed to Shut Up by Senator John McCain.

Those two egos are probably fit to be tied over that humbling by McCain.

Bill especially must be mortally wounded.

Lacking evidence of Bill Clinton's pain, I will imagine that he is feeling bruised and I will derive some pleasure from that presumtion.

posted by Wild 1:27:00 AM |

Euro-politics creaking in the wind

This article speaks of the possible effect France's leader Jacque Chirac (and his recent blowup at "new" Europe) will have on the expansion of the European Union is intriguing.

France wants to be among the big boys on the block and has decided to sit on a pile of smaller Europeans countries to achieve this. What the Gauls have failed to understand (don't they always) is that all the countries emerging from the soviet block have all recently been under tyrannical foreign domination and not only are they eager to express themselves freely, they are also not going to agree to simply exchange one foreign domination for another.

These countries predictably responded viscerally to Chirac's idiotic rant and will now approach integration with a wariness and suspicion that they otherwise would not have had.

Sweet Poland started the internal work against the European Soviet Block which help begin the final toppling of the Soviets. That is more than what the slug-licking Gauls ever ventured to do the entire 20th century long.

posted by Wild 12:33:00 AM |

Calling a frog a frog

Misha of the blog Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler, in this post, expresses an energetic displeasure with the French regarding their grandstanding in Europe.

Very rich reading.

posted by Wild 12:06:00 AM |

Zora Zora Zora

Zora won and all is well in the world. She was very distinct from the rest of the ladies vying for the heart of Joe Millionaire.

In the beginning, the show had a sleaze factor rivalling Bill Clinton's but sweet Zora, by being so 'traditional', single-handedly forced the show to take off from the sleaze runway and begin to fly into wholesome airspace.

Clubbeaux has an interesting write-up on why she was ultimately chosen.

posted by Wild 1:27:00 AM |

The Democratic Massage

I was reading down a previous article on this blog and noticed that each time I intended to write the word "message" I spelled it as "Massage".

I wrote that Democrats were failing to get their massage across.

I have corrected the error. After living through a Bill Clinton presidency, I no longer believe that Democrats have trouble getting out the massage.

posted by Wild 12:30:00 PM |

The Embryonic Leftist Propaganda Machine

This story out of the New York Times made me laugh.

It seems that wealthy leftists have been feeling rather glum about the success of the conservative message in the broadcasting business. The Fox News Network has spiraled into the stratosphere along with radio hosts such as Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity; Michael Savage; Michael Reagan.

In the past, attempts by the left to gain equivalent star power in radio have met dismal ends. Democrat darlings Mario Cuomo and Jim Hightower flopped as radio talk show hosts and the Democrats to this day do not understand why.

“Mario Cuomo is a brilliant man,” they say to each other. “Why did people not gravitate to his lofty and ear-pleasing verbiage?”

I will venture an explanation for the lack of success among leftist talk shows and an explanation for why I think they will fail in the future.

The first obstruction to leftist success is of course Leftism itself. Leftist ideas suck. Leftist ideas are depressing and are flat lines on the inspirational meter.
Leftism, even when sugarcoated and served by a smiling host, tolls like a funeral bell. It sounds like death itself. Let me explain what I mean.
A leftist talk show host would at some point advocate that people should depend on the state for their needs. Such a host would argue that people are wards of the state. They would conceal the direct message but it would still come across as that.
When people who are dependent on the state hear that message, it invokes more than a little regret over their own lost hopes. Being reminded of one's dependence on other people does not evoke a bursting pride in people.
Those who support the state via taxes become vexed by the constant stream of propaganda that encourages people to rely on the resources of the state. These people know that each person who becomes a ward of the state is an added burden on those who are taxed. People don’t mind pooling resources to help those in genuine need but when they hear a radio show actually advocating an increase the number of dependants on the state so as to expand and solidify a political party's voting base, the radio show gets tuned out.
Both sides of the equation become vexed by the negative mood-souring message and the idiot host has his ratings plunge.
To try gain popularity, some try to be funny like comedian Al Franken who wrote a leftist diatribe that attacked Rush Limbaugh as a "big fat idiot". After a while, the bitter humour becomes so hollow and grating that it becomes indigestable to all but a handful of hate-filled commie freaks.

The second obstruction to leftist success is motive. In the article linked to above, you have a committee of leftist buddies getting together to find an ideologue who can best pump out leftist propaganda..
Compare that to the rightist beginnings. Rush and Michael Reagan and many other began shows out of their own passionate feelings and struggled for many years perfecting their trade. They innovated their styles and content eventually winning huge audiences. There was never a committee to steer Rush or Laura Ingrahm. They motivated themselves and fought against the current towards a vision that they had in their own minds and not some dumb party speaking points faxed from H.Q. daily by Bill Clinton.

The human spirit that struggles from the bottom to pursue dreams against the tide is what democrats don’t understand. Their attempts to gain broadcast market share using a ideological committee smacks of totalitarianism and is a microcosm of their entire philosophy.

They believe that an elite group should mould a message that can then be force-fed to the people by funding radio shows and television networks.
Rush started on one station and sold his message till he became the powerhouse that he is now.

The left want a shortcut (as they always do). Since they can’t sell their message fair and square, they want to get some bucks together and buy themselves an audience and force people to listen to party-approved crap.

They had better brace themselves for another failure. I'm looking forward to it.

posted by Wild 12:48:00 AM |

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